Hey guys! So at first I wasn’t too sure if I’d be sending a blog. I’m very picky with what I share, and I didn’t really have much to say this week until about 10 minutes ago. And like I’ve spoken to before, when you least expect an idea, there it comes. So here we are with this week’s topic.
I am a planner. I love planning ahead of time. I love knowing what my day looks like. I have a vision board. I love to manifest. I love to think of my future, what it looks like, and how I’m going to get there. For 25 years I have been a strong advocate of planning and having plans.
My struggle comes with planning a future and living in the present. I have a “Live Now” tattoo to remind me that the only time is the now, but I have all of these thoughts about my future and what it looks like. I am a walking contradiction. One day I’m doing my best to live for today, and in the same day I’m looking at houses I might want a few years from now. It’s exhausting.
So just like everything else in my life I’m learning that there isn’t always a this or that answer. Life isn’t as black and white as I’d like it to be. And for someone who has anxiety, trying to except the unknown seems near impossible.
Living day by day is a pipe dream for me. And honestly I don’t really want to be a day by day person. I can admire those who are, but realistically being able to plan in advance is in my blood.
The future is important to think about, but my ass takes it a little too far (no pun intended). So for now, I’m going to work towards being a week by week person. Think of things that are realistically in reach and set out to achieve them. By living week by week I’m hoping the anxiety eases and the future stays prominent.
This wasn’t the most “motivational” post, but I hope it helps someone stay a little more present. Anxiety sucks, do your best not to fuel the fire.